Conversations With A Sedona Retreat Leader:
Doing Something About How Your Children See the World

A few months back, I had two wonderful mothers [in Sedona] on multi-day Sedona retreat.  What was interesting is that even though they were on separate retreats they had very similar stories—in fact they looked alike! Both were recently divorced and had multiple children. During my meetings with them, I had some deep insights about their children and higher-level parenting. I promised Beth I would write a story about my insights which she heard deeply (Go Beth! Testimonial)

I want to set this article up by telling you a few interesting facts:

According to current traditional mental health literature children learn in three different ways: one, they inherit their parents inner emotional life; two, how their parents are interacting with the world and each other, in other words, modeling; and three, what you’re telling them verbally (which drops dramatically when they become teenagers!)

Between birth and age 7, kids are a giant sponge, they have no discernment, they take in everything both positive and negative. The information they receive forms their subconscious which they will see their world through, especially when they are in a low mood.

Sometimes with clients on Sedona retreats it might be important to identify the beliefs and imprints from their childhood they are still operating from or seeing the world through. Those imprints are really like a filter we look through and then experience our world based on the content of that imprint. For example: “I can’t get anything right. I’m always wrong.” If you looked at your world through these words, you get a constant state of judgment of yourself and need to be perfect or fear of making a mistake.
Now back to my two clients and their kids. I asked them both two questions:

1. What imprints and beliefs do you think your children formed as result of watching you and your ex-husband go through conflict and then divorce? Remember based on the above and they way kids learn—they picked up on that interaction no matter how much you both tried to hide it.
2. What imprints and beliefs did you yourself create from that experiences leading to divorce? And again, remembering, that your kids will inherit your inner emotional life

I think these are powerful questions and they take courage to explore. But I believe the process can really create a different future for your children and yourself. My assertion is why not address these beliefs now as opposed to when they become adults. Make sense?

Depending on the children’s age, you can actually engage them in a partnership about discovering these beliefs—trying to keep it as light as possible. For example, a general one: “When you saw Daddy and me fighting what did you feel or think”? Or, if they are perhaps a teenage girl, you could ask them, “Do you think it’s okay for women to not fight back and just try and go along?” That’s a big one and one that has come up many times on retreat. Or the opposite, a non verbal one: “When someone is yelling at you, you yell back louder and don’t let them win!”

There are so many negative messages being passed around when a couple is having trouble. So, if you could sit down and really try and identify them, I believe it would take your parenting to a higher level because you would see very clearly why your children are behaving in a certain way and thus see their innocence. But also, see your innocence and don’t get into a big guilt trip! “Oh my God, what have I done to my children?” That will help nothing. You were living your life and parenting from that information you had—period! You are getting more and perhaps new information right now! Go make use of it, my friends!

I suggested to Beth, that in partnership with her children she could actually write these down and put them on the refrigerator. And to point out to herself and her children when they are seeing the world through one of the beliefs, which of course are usually negative. Ask yourself and your kids: “Am I seeing this event through the negative filter of the past or is there another possible way of looking at this?” Wow! Can you imagine how powerful that would be if a twelve year old heard that? The mission is to empower yourself and your children to have an insight that when they see their world or events negatively it’s coming out of these beliefs and has nothing to do with reality!

When I explain to parents the three ways children learn, they all get it but very few make the connection to their present day parenting and those three rules. Meaning, they don’t realize at a deeper level that the way to teach their children is by working on themselves, by modeling to them. If you are divorced and want to help your children dissolve those beliefs that were formed, then first dissolve them in yourself—simply stop seeing your life thru them: “I will never open myself again to another man.” Guess how your teenager is going to interact with the opposite sex when they get older?

I sense this is the first installment, lots to talk about on this subject! Brothers and sisters, go about this exploration with lightness, continue to invite your natural wisdom to assist you—meaning stay out of your head—you head-trippers know who you are!
Let your parenting be an exploration!
A Ho,
Greg

Gregory Drambour is our guest contributor for Spirituality Week.  You can read more about Gregory on his website, Sedona Sacred Journeys.

Have we got some recommendations for you!

Dear Arizona Travel:
I would like to come to Sedona in August. I am totally burned out and need some guidance and a healing retreat. Can you help?

-Jenni from Long Island, NY

ChristinaToo says:
Hi, Jenny. The following Sedona retreats providers can be found on our website, Sedona.net. Any one of them would be an excellent resource for you.

• SpiritQuest Sedona – A holistic approach to help you expand your consciousness and radically transform your life. Combining ancient wisdom with modern modalities, you’ll experience private one-on-one sessions with Sedona’s very best spiritual guides, intuitives and healers.
• Angel Valley Spiritual Retreat Center – This all-inclusive spiritual retreat center is located on 70 acres, surrounded by the Coconino National Forest, outlined by Oak Creek, with creekside guesthouses, cabins, and tipis. This Arizona retreat center uses uniquely empowering earth energies and a wide variety of healing services to connect within.
• Sedona Soul Counseling – Embark upon what Sedona Soul Counseling calls “SpiriTravel,” in Sedona or around the globe, and experience soul activation through nature walks and hikes; swimming with dolphins or manatees; or playing with wolves or wild horses.
• Sedona Soul Adventures – Amazing spiritual retreats and transformational soul adventures with Sedona’s master healers, intuitives, artists and spiritual guides.  One-of-a-kind personal spiritual retreats will open your heart and change your life.
• Enchantment Resort and Mii Amo Spa – the ultimate in luxury accommodations and spa experiences.  Choose from three, four and seven-day spa journeys and dozens of healing treatments and activities.

You can find more information about these providers on our website at:
Sedona Psychic, Spiritual & Vortex Guide and Sedona Spas, Alternative Healing and Retreats and Sedona Retreats and Lodging.

Take care of yourself,
-Christina

International Spiritual Experience is proud to announce a unique retreat at Angel Valley Spiritual Retreat Center, March 25-31, 2008 devoted to “Explorations into Energy Consciousness.”

All of life begins and ends with the movement of energy through our bodies, auric fields, the environment, and in our relationships. The quality and types of energetic flow affect us on every level, at all times. Awareness of this energy can be defined as “energy consciousness”.

Everyday, we experience variations of energy such as changes in time, emotion, memory, sense of identity, cognitive processes, perception of the world, use of the body, and interaction with the world through our awareness or state of consciousness. Furthermore, the pattern that is revealed within the energy of consciousness is self-reflexive (influences itself) and self-organizing. Geometrically speaking, it forms a spiral vortex which continuously flows back upon and refreshes itself. So, our understanding of the energy we work with in our lives affects ourselves, our relationships and everything around us on physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual levels in distinctive ways.

As spiritual souls it is especially important to understand how and why energy creates particular feelings and experiences for us. Then, we can begin to learn to raise our awareness and manifest the best uses of energy to heal and transform ourselves, those around us and our environment.
The “Explorations in Energy Consciousness” retreat will offer numerous in-depth workshops designed to integrate new ways of thinking about energy that many of us have not mapped out yet in the ordinary experiences of our lives. Some of the types of energy workshops include: earth energies and vortexes; angelic energies; intuitive and telepathic development; energetic healing modalities; the energy of soulmate relationships; and ancestor energy.

Expert teachers, healers, and psychics will be presenting workshops and activities all week long.
Jaap van Etten, PhD is a scientist whose interest is in the connection between human energy systems and earth energies. He can read energies and is a healer who also works extensively with crystal skulls. Jeanne Michaels, MA is a healer who uses many methodologies. She channels dolphin energy; archangels and light beings. She also works with crystal skull and the energetics of water. Michael Redsky was gifted his spiritual knowledge from a near death experience, ways taught to him by the Old Ones and his elders. He uses traditional Native American methods for curing and spirit communication. He is also a flutist and drummer. Margo Callaghan is a healer who practices Usui Reiki and Integrated Energy and uses Egyptian Healing Rods. She is also and intuitive artist who paint’s the essence of spirit on canvas. Dr. Patti Diamond is an author and spiritual medium who specializes in the energy of Soulmate Relationships. She is also the director of the Diamondlight International Spiritual Oneness Center. Monica Ocean is trained clairvoyant from Berkley Psychic Institute who telepaths spirit. She does hands on healing, aura cleansing, past life and astral work, meditation and hatha yoga.

The retreat will be held at Angel Valley Spiritual Retreat Center. Angel Valley is located on 70 private acres 20-minutes from Sedona and is surrounded by thousands of acres of National Forest. Oak Creek runs through Angel Valley year round. 20 different vortexes have been identified at Angel Valley, along with lines and labyrinths creating a unique energetic environment to support this journey of self-discovery, healing. The price of the retreat is $1600 for the week which includes accommodations at Angel Valley, food, workshops, and activities. $1160 includes everything except accommodations. $165 is the price for day without lodging, but includes food, workshops, and activities. A $270 deposit holds your space.

For more information or to sign up. Go to http://www.internationalspiritualexperience.com or call Gina at 479-754-8273, email: treeoc333@yahoo.com